Is the sun really rising every day?

 In Diary in therapy, Februar 2009

S. sits opposite me and smiles. How many times has she heard these same sentences? Everyone complains that the therapy takes too long, that you do not feel anything and that it is a waste of time.
S. is still smiling.
Slowly she tells me (about 100 times) that I should give myself time. I opted for the therapy and therefore for my life. My negative thinking is very deep in me and rooted in me. For so many years, I think and feel everything negative and directed against me.
I never doubted my thoughts. For me they were so true and represented the same reality as the fact that in the morning the sun rises and the day begins. This is also a fact and I would never think of thinking about whether this is right and will always happen.
In order to get further in therapy, I should become aware of my thoughts and then question them. Is my negativity speaking again or is it really that way? If, as so often happens, it turns out to be my own negativity perceived by me speaking to me, I should not only question my thoughts, but also put them into reality.
This all takes a very long time. The negativity did not come overnight. It has developed slowly and slowly. For many years she has been confirmed by me and thus my own little world.
To get well, I begin to question this world of disease. the more often I do it (of course with the help of my therapist) e.g. not to interprete the views of someone on the street against me, the easier it will be for me to see and feel the reality. Clear and objectively.

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